Quien Es Mas Mexicano? Tutti-frutti Burritos y Otras Delicias…
Once you’ve started buying your whole-wheat tortillas as breakfast pastries, you can probably forget the jalapeno-eating contests with your macho buddies. You’ll be lucky to be invited to chow down on some fresh-roasted Hatch chiles when those guys roll into town during the season.
You’ll be relegated to hanging out with metrosexuals, and your best friends will be women who’ve rejected the traditional role-playing in favor of the more masculine pursuits of self-employment and job creation.
That’s okay, because it’s worth it. Because once you’ve got it through your inch-thick skull that a wheat tortilla is more than just a playground for fatback and pintos, pico de gallo to spice it up and iceberg lettuce for roughage (hopefully), then the world is your tortilla, so to speak. Here’s my latest discovery.
Uncle Hardie’s recipe for fresh fruit burritos:
Butter one whole-wheat tortilla lightly—per usual—and proceed to flip it over and back a few times in a pre-heated skillet until it gets almost too hot to handle. Now this is the stage at which it usually either gets crispy or puffs up like a big sopaipilla—or both, right? But before that happens spread it evenly with thinly-sliced fruit, according to the season. Give it a minute like that, then roll it up, or fold it over, at least. Season to taste, and consider adding honey. Simple, you’re done. Eat. You’re welcome.
My next step is to try it with yogurt, maybe Greek, that and rename it, re-brand it. They won’t sell as burritos, so maybe ‘crepe’ something or other. Maybe then I can start hanging out uptown instead of downtown. Maybe then I can get a sugar-daddy sponsor. Maybe then I can find ultimate fulfillment. Qui est plus femme?